I went to sleep at around 6 this morning. I submitted my last assignment for Social Psychology course on Coursera, then fell asleep almost instantly. The dream came, full of anxiety about the assignment. I wanted to do it well, but I don’t think I did. Although the result will only come next week, the first thing when I woke up was to reach out to my laptop and checked my grade for the assignment last week. I had another 10/10 this time, which put me more at ease. Grading my peers’ assignments for this week also helped. There are many people out there who could do things better than I do, but I’m not too bad neither.
After watching the last lecture, I was quite emotional. These waves of emotion already came to me a couple of days ago. This course is coming to an end. I still remember the first week when I struggled with the first assignment which was maths-related. Linh was with me back then, gave me encouragement. Then week after week, I needed to write long assignments and I always ended up with staying up very late on Sunday evening. The first time I submitted the assignment before 4a.m, then the second time was after 4a.m, and this time it was nearly 6a.m. Sometimes I thought of giving up. I didn’t aim too high, I didn’t think of 90 points to get the Statement of Accomplishment with Distinction. 70 points to get the Statement of Accomplishment seemed to be good enough for me. But then I pushed myself harder. I mean, why not? I like the course so much. It’s incredible and mind-blowing, it has given me so many “ah-ha” moments. Isn’t it just fair that I give it my best? There’s no reason not to. Every Monday, I would wait for my grade for the previous week’s assignment, and wait for Prof. Scott Plous’s email which mentions what’s new for the coming week. I like his gentle and calming tone. Monday doesn’t seem to be bad to me.
All of this is going to end. Although it’s just an online course, I haven’t met Prof. Scott nor the staffs nor any of my “classmates” during the whole time studying, but I feel so attached to them. And everything has been so well-structured and thorough, I don’t think I can imagine correctly the enormous amount of work and effort they put in. I simply… love it to bits, even there were some dark and heavy theories being covered there.
I will really be missing it.
Other than Social Psychology course which was my main attention, during the day I also visited Full House. It saddened me that it seems I lost all of my postcards for certain. The photo with all of us in Lapland, the photo I bought at Disneyland when I first visited my sister in France, the card that my neighbor gave me for Christmas – name a few of them. It’s really sad. But anyway, I managed to give what Dean asked me to give to Na, and I got some of my stuffs back thanks to Long (not the Long back then, another Long I saw a couple of times that I thought he was Chinese). He carried the microwave for me from Full House back to my place.
Many people replied to my emails, which made me happy, too. Writing, writing… I like it.
Ah, it feels like after pouring my heart to the assignment about the Day of Compassion, the heavy stone in my heart was lifted, and my mood has been much better now. Or was it because the recent lectures have been much lighter?