10.12.2013.

Although it has been more difficult and takes longer time for me to fall asleep, I had a nice dream last night. I don’t remember how it really was anymore, but I remember my family and Truc and Linh. At the end, there was this person who hugged me with one hand around my waist and the other hand holding my head while leaning gently toward me. It was soft and tender and it felt so real, as if I could imagine it now and it would still make my heart flutter.

I was nervous when I went to the Maths exam. The last time I took a test was back in March with YKI. I still remember it was already spring. I walked with Oanh and Khoa to Axxell. We did the test over lunch, and walked back to Lärkkulla. We talked about many things on the way, including our love and determination for the future. When we got back, we cooked some food, stayed at the kitchen, joked around about how loud Erik was during the speaking test. I think it was also the day Ui made sushi. I remember how exhausted I was after the test, as if there was no energy left in me at all. It was the first time ever I felt like that. I told Katariina and she said, Well, maybe you didn’t realize it, but you were indeed stressed over it. And I remember the hugs. Oanh and Khoa and I hugged each other, wished we would do it well. And I remember imagining Brown Hair quietly putting his hand on my shoulder during the test, assuring it would be all fine… It had been that long already.

This time, at least I got a hug in my dream. It also came to me at a moment when I was doing the test. Made me smile. I’m not sure how the result will turn out. I did it better than previously when I didn’t go to class of course, but maybe I made some small mistakes – I don’t know, that’s hard to be certain. I think I will pass though.

I liked today.

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